Have you ever thought about the volume of misfortune and heartache created in our world today just because someone cannot admit that he/she is wrong? Yes, admitting a wrong definitely creates a psychic vulnerability. The person who goes through life constantly admitting to himself and others how hes been wrong about this or that would be a walking train wreck at the end of each day. However, thats not a situation we normally encounter in daily life. In a more typical situation, we sit on this one single incident in which we were on the wrong side, and we let this single incident continue to burn like an invisible bomb with time-fuse lit. The situation continues to eat away at our relationships, our energies and starts slowly but surely to erode our innate sense of whats good, pleasant and even holly until we wonder why we have paid such a steep price for it after all. Try unloading the heavy weight of the unacknowledged wrong for a change and see the kind of instantaneous relief it brings and the dramatic difference it makes in your daily life. Years ago I watched a TV program in which actor Charles Heston, during a dinner event hosted to honor the 50th anniversary of his marriage (a miracle by any standard), was asked to share the secret of such a long relationship. Heston, without missing a beat, quipped that his secret was hidden in three simple words, repeated frequently: Honey, Im wrong. When I admitted doing or thinking wrong (which I did frequently in the past although perhaps not frequent enough) I almost always discovered to my delight how unbelievably forgiving people are in general. Most people are more forgiving than you might think simply because theyve been there themselves -- and not once either. So in such admissions and confessions people actually find a deeply healing collective therapeutic value. (The Catholic institution of Confession would not have otherwise survived this long.) The simple wisdom of admitting a wrong sometimes is understood the least by politicians that get into hot water. What ends up destroying their careers and tarnishing their names is not the original wrongdoing as much as the later denial and refusal to own up to it. And thats really what a cover up is all about. The path from power to hubris is a very short one when you think you are perfect and hence incapable of any wrongdoing after looking at the number of people singing your praises or patting yourself on the back for that last deposit into your bank account. Drop the wrong and be free, or get crushed with its ever bloating weight. Its our call. But the world would surely be a better place to live if we can bring ourselves to opt for the former as frequently as humanly possible. ------------------------------------------------ |
